Just a Thought

Hello again everyone and welcome to my blog.

This time of year holds a very poignant moment for me. I have been reflecting on it and realise that I share my experience with so many people in the world. I thought that maybe if I share my thoughts with you all I hope it may give upliftment to those who need it, and be cathartic for me, so here goes.

Many people in times of distress hold their hands up and say, “Why has this happened to me? What good can come out of it?”

Maybe it is due to the passing of someone close. It could be that someone close to you, or even you yourself could be having health issues. Whatever the circumstances, I believe that nothing happens in this life without a good reason.

Those that only take the negatives out of such an event are likely to carry them around forever and remain in a well of unhappiness. If, however, they try to look at the positives, and I know it’s hard, they will find their burden lifted to a degree and in many cases find out who they really are.

I know Cheryl won't mind me telling you all but in January it was the anniversary of my first wife Rachel’s passing.

At the time I was totally bereft and alone. I had not only lost my wife of 30 years but my best and closest friend. I could not cook, not even boil an egg. I did not deal with the household finances and didn't even know anything about the bills I had to pay. If you had asked me then what I thought, my message to those above would have been unprintable. I might as well have been stranded in the middle of a desert without food or water.

Unlike being stranded though, I discovered that I had many friends, who rallied round to help me. Indeed some people I did not even know were my friends turned out to be so. There was my first lesson. I had always thought that the world was an uncaring, hostile place to be in but I was shown that there are many people who are good and kind, offering help to those in need without the expectation of reward.

As the time went on, with my own determination and the help and patience of my friends, I learned to cook and clean, to wash and iron and everything to do with household finances.

I never thought that I would ever meet anyone special again until Cheryl came into my life. So from being totally breft and alone, I now realised how lucky I was.

Looking at the events now I realise that Rachel’s passing released her from much pain and misery bravely borne, and I believe that she is now watching from spirit, totally amazed at my progression. I have also discovered myself and have hopefully learned many lessons too.

Cheryl was sent to me, I am sure, to help and guide me further.

Yes I will always remember Rachel and still shed a tear sometimes, but it is not disrespectful to those we have lost to move your life along, quite the contrary. The past is a memory locked inside of us and cannot be changed whatever you do. The future lies ahead waiting to be shaped. It is up to each of us to decide if we should take the negative path and languish in the doldrums forever, or to use the lessons of the past to direct ourselves to a bright and happy future. Don't look to others to determine your destiny, they can only help and advise through a situation. Ultimately we shape our own destinies and you and only you can decide on which path you choose.

New Year's Resolutions

Well, it’s the beginning of a new year and this is the time when most of us resolve to do better than the last. Invariably the vast majority of us have probably already failed dismally.

This made me start thinking, why do we have to wait for the beginning of a new year to look to be a better person?

I realised that whatever you do in life there is always an appropriate reward waiting for you as a direct result.

Just consider if you have overspent on your credit card “buying happiness” for Christmas. Your reward will be a mighty bill later on, which may then impinge on your happiness for a long time to come.

You may have decided not to spend and so your reward will be a healthier bank balance.

This kind of logic can be applied to all of us throughout our lives. If you do a good deed, look at it as money in the bank. The more you do the more you accrue. Eventually, and maybe at a most unexpected moment, your reward will present itself to you.

Alternatively if you choose to send out nothing but negativity then that will accrue in your life bank and will eventually jump up and bite you on the bum.

We all have choices in life, choices that we are free to make, that will undoubtedly affect our well being as well as others.

This coming year we have been warned over and over again that it will be one of austerity, but we need not be economic with love and goodwill as it costs not a penny.

Try to make your choices this year positive ones. If you fail at any given point in the year just recognise you are only human and resolve to try again immediately.

Don’t wait for the next new year to start!!